Whenever I'm bored, I like to imagine that I can raise historical figures from the dead and give them tours of modern life.

Take Beethoven. I figure Beethoven would immediately be disturbed that girls now wear pants. So I'd play a late-career Elvis recording and point out that no one looks good shaking her butt in an empire-waist gown. Then I'd drive him west on I-80, put his Ninth Symphony on my car stereo and watch him go nuts.

Well, now I have a new daydream: To bring John Muir to the Outdoor Retailer Convention.

I've loved John Muir ever since I learned about him in 7th grade social studies in Iowa. He must have been so awesome, running around the mountains with nothing but his curiosity and an agenda to preserve them.

But I never wanted to bring John Muir to the present. Yosemite still has the same peaks. Aspens still look like aspens. And modern conveniences would be totally lost on someone who liked to camp without a tent or sleeping bag.

I thought about John Muir's no-frills backcountry adventures as I got lost amidst the booths at the Outdoor Retailer Convention. The ORC turns the Salt Palace into a dizzying megalopolis of gear developers, buyers and sellers. There were snowshoe stands, one after another. A rep for the Canadian manufacturer GV showed me separate models for racing, for packed snow, for fluffy snow, for hills, for flat land and for hunting, all with various grades of metal, crampon positions and graphics. You kind of forget that someone is calculating all the nuanced needs of every conceivable snowshoer.

Columbia displayed electronically-heated boots with 2010 updates, like removable batteries and lighter material. Next to the boots were jackets stuffed with a synthetic material made to mimic down and lined with metallic fabric that reflects dry heat but conducts when it gets moist. Basically, the jacket can tell when you're sweaty.

There were stacks of high-energy gum drops and jelly beans. Down sleeping bags that fit under matching down jackets. A "Jakpak" rain jacket, which has a zip-in-zip-out sleeping bag, bivy tent and mosquito net. And GSI had an entire wall display of camp cooking sets with various configurations of neon-colored sippy cups.

What would John Muir think? Sure, this might not be his sippy cuppa.

But there is one big thing he might appreciate about all this fancy gear: Regular people want to get out there.

We want to see these places he fought to protect. It is no longer extreme to go into nature. It is accessible, even comfortable. Without a waterproof jacket, an otherwise-inspired 7th-grader from Iowa might not ever go for a multiday trip into the mountains. Way fewer people might be interested in preserving beautiful places.

If I could take John Muir to the ORC, he may not be convinced to try on a fluorescent yellow backpack equipped with a "hydration system." But I think he'd at least be a little gratified to know how big a deal his vision has become.

Erin Alberty has more Utah adventures and musings on her blog, poorpenmanship.com.